A group of friends wanted to get together on a regular basis to socialize and play games. They decided that the lady of the house was to prepare a meal. When it came time for Hank and Lydia to be the hosts, Lydia wanted to outdo all the others. She decided to have mushroom-smothered steak. But mushrooms are expensive, so she told her husband, "No mushrooms. They are too high."
Hank asked, "Why don't you go down into the pasture and pick some of them there mushrooms? There's plenty in the creek bed."
She said, "No, some wild mushrooms are poison."
He said, "Well, I see varmints eatin' them, and they're okay."
So Lydia decided to give it a try. She picked a bunch, washed, sliced, and diced them for her smothered steak. Then she went out on the back porch and gave Ol' Spot (the yard dog) a double handful. Ol' Spot ate every bite. All morning long, Lydia watched Ol' Spot and the wild mushrooms didn't seem to affect him, so she decided to use them.
The meal was a great success, and Lydia even hired a helper lady from town to help her serve. After everyone had finished, they relaxed, socialized, and played Uno and Rummy. About then, the helper lady came in and whispered in Lydia's ear, "Ma'am, Ol' Spot is dead."
Lydia immediately went into hysterics. Hank explained to their guests that there was a problem with the evening's meal and that medical help was necessary. Then he called the doctor and told him what had happened. The doctor said, "That's bad, but I think we can take care of it. I will call for an ambulance and I will be there as quickly as possible. We'll give everyone enemas, and pump out their stomachs. Everything will be fine. Just keep them calm."
Soon they could hear the siren as the ambulance was coming down the road. The EMT's and the doctor had their suitcases, syringes, and a stomach pump. One by one, they took each person into the bathroom, gave them an enema, and pumped out their stomach. After the last one was finished, the doctor came out and said, "I think everything will be fine now," and he left.
They were all looking pretty weak sitting around the living room, and about this time the helper lady came in and whispered to Lydia, "You know that feller that run over Ol' Spot? Well, he never even did stop!"
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