FAIR WARNING

Ok, world, I am trying to grow a plant. Yes, you heard correctly. The woman who can kill a plant by simply trying to water it, prune it, and/or plant its seed is stepping out of her comfort zone.

Two weeks ago a friend gave me an actual clipping of her Coleus plant. I brought it home and dutifully placed it in a small glass of water hoping for roots. Guess what? It sprouted roots! Oodles of 'em, to be sure.

Yesterday I bought a nice olive green pot from Walmart. Didn't sink too much money into it because, well, just in case it doesn't survive . . .

Next step? Call in a professional. That would be our son, O'Man. He dumped some of our home-spun compost into that pot o' mine, and then he settled little "Claudia" the Coleus into her new home. He wet her feet a little and then handed her over to me. (Next time I'LL do my own dirty work.) *blushing*

I did a bit of research and found out she is a shade loving plant. That's good to know because I was ready to take her out into the sizzling sun. Now she silently sits on my kitchen windowsill looking outside. Ain't she a cutie?

* Check out my CRAFTS/HOBBIES page under my guest book for some helpful info on how to care for a Coleus plant.

WORDS OF WISDOM

Give people more than they expect and do it cheerfully.

Marry someone you love to talk to. As you get older, their conversational skills will be as important as any other.

When you say, "I love you," mean it.

Believe in love at first sight.

Never laugh at anyone's dreams. People without dreams don't have much vision.

Love deeply and passionately. You might get hurt, but it's the only way to live life completely.

In disagreements, fight fairly. No name calling.

Talk slowly, but think quickly.

When someone asks you a question you don't want to answer, smile and ask, "Why do you want to know?"

When you lose, don't lose the lesson.

Remember the three R's: Respect for self; Respect for others; and Responsibility for all your actions.

Don't let a little dispute ruin a great friendship.

When you realize you've made a mistake, take immediate steps to correct it.

Spend some time alone.

Smile when picking up the phone. The caller will hear it in your voice.

Don't judge people by their relatives.

When you say, "I'm sorry," look the person in the eye.

Don't believe all you hear, spend all you have, or sleep all you want.

DON'T WORRY . . . BE HAPPY

Here's a little song I wrote

You might want to sing it note for note
Don't worry - Be happy!
In every life we have some trouble
When you worry you make it double
Don't worry - Be happy!
Don't worry - Be happy now!

Oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo
Don't worry
oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo
Be happy
oo-oo-oo-oo-oo
Don't worry - Be happy!

Oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo
Don't worry
oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo
Be happy
oo-oo-oo-oo-oo
Don't worry - Be happy!

Ain't got no place to lay your head
Somebody came and took your bed
Don't worry - Be happy!
The landlord say your rent is late
He may have to litigate
Don't worry (ha ha ha ha ha ha ha)- Be happy!
Look at me - I'm happy!

Oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo
Don't worry
oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo
Be happy
oo-oo-oo-oo-oo
Here I give you my phone number
When you worry call me
I make you happy

Oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo
Don't worry
oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo
Be happy
oo-oo-oo-oo-oo

Ain't got no cash, ain't got no style
Ain't got no gal to make you smile
But don't worry - Be happy!
Cause when you worry Your face will frown
And that will bring everybody down
So don't worry - Be happy!
Don't worry - Be happy now.

Oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo
Don't worry
oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo
Be happy
oo-oo-oo-oo-oo
Don't worry - Be happy!

Oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo
Don't worry
oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo
Be happy
oo-oo-oo-oo-oo
Don't worry - Be happy!

Oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo
Don't worry - don't worry - don't do it - be happy!
00-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo
Put a smile on your face
Don't bring everybody down like this
Oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo
Don't worry,
00-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo
It will soon pass whatever it is
00-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo
Don't worry - Be happy!
Oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo

[Lyrics by: Bobby McFerrin]

MOM'S MEDAL OF HONOR

The chain is connected to a double stem referred to as the "Stem of Life". One stem represents the physical connection - the umbilical cord. The other stem represents the spiritual connection between mother and child that lasts a lifetime.

The diamond is the purest of all minerals; furthermore, the diamond is the hardest substance in the known universe. Therefore, the diamond was chosen for the centerpiece not only to represent the balance that mothers bring to the family, but also as an international symbol of strength, purity, and admiration.

Six hearts represent the six letters in the word MOTHER. All of the hearts point toward the diamond and form a star around the diamond. Just as the stars have guided the travelers for centuries, so have mothers guided their children.

The lines that radiate from the center are referred to as "rays of sacrifice" and symbolize the 365 days per year that mothers make sacrifices both large and small for the benefit of their children.

Finally, on the back are four simple but powerful words that sum up a child's sincere appreciation for a lifetime of love and guidance . . . "To Mother with Love".

A CHUCKLE 4U - "Universal Symbol for Marriage"

I saw this symbol on a cup insulator and it struck me as funny. Thought I'd share it with y'all.

A CHUCKLE 4U - "Friends"

Friends are like bras - close to the heart and always their for support.

If no one told you they love you today, you are hanging with the wrong people.

A CHUCKLE 4U - "Do You Hear What I Hear?"

A man feared his wife wasn't hearing as well as she used to and he thought she might need a hearing aid. Not quite sure how to approach her, he called the family doctor to discuss the problem. The doctor told him there is a simple, informal test the husband could perform to give the doctor a better idea about her hearing loss.

"Here's what you do," said the doctor, "stand about 40 feet away from her, and in a normal conversational speaking tone see if she hears you. If not, go to 30 feet, then 20 feet, and so on until you get a response."

That evening, the wife was in the kitchen cooking dinner and he was in the den. He says to himself, 'I'm about 40 feet away, let's see what happens." Then in a normal tone he asks, "Honey, what's for dinner?"

No response.

So the husband moves closer to the kitchen, about 30 feet away from his wife and repeats, "Honey, what's for dinner?"

Still no response.

Next he moves into the dining room where he is about 20 feet from his wife and asks, "Honey, what's for dinner?"

Again, he gets no response.

So, he walks up to the kitchen door, about 10 feet away. "Honey, what's for dinner?"

Again, there is no response.

So he walks right up behind her. "Honey, what's for dinner?"

(I just love this! =)

"Chicken, Ralph! For the FIFTH TIME, CHICKEN!"

FUNNY SOUNDS ON THE WAY HOME

. . . and here is what caused all those funny sounds!

Can you see those two goofy eyeballs? They belong to our "Cutie." She does the craziest things for her little brother just to make him laugh and squeal and screech!

I ASKED FOR IT . . . AND BOY, DID I GET IT

I woke up this morning to check on Amorphophallus titanumi Corpse Flower Lois and to my surprise this is what I found!!!!!! =P

Be sure to TURN UP the volume on this clip (or your computer) and turn DOWN (or mute) the volume on my playlist at the bottom of my blog. If you don't do this, the music on my blog will interfere with this video's song.

FYI - The volume and mute button are located beneath the two exclamation marks in the upper right-hand corner of the playlist box. Click on the volume lever and drag it downward or just click on the "speaker" looking button to mute. Easy, Cheesy, Peasy, right? :)


A Song For Lois [Amorphophallus titanum] from HMNS on Vimeo.


Ode to Lois
Written and performed by Kelsey Williams

Get up extra early, just to see
That totally awesome flower that’s taller than you or me
She sits in the Butterfly Center at HMNS
When she blooms you’ll smell her for a half mile radius
Oh, Lois. Come on and let your corpse-smell flow-is.
Open up your petals and show us.
Cuz we’ve been waiting one whole week
Runnin up flights of stairs to get a peek
Of Lois. Come on and let your corpse-smell flow-is.
Runnin out of words that rhyme with Lois.
La la la la la la la la grow for us.

Hurry up and bloom, alright? Or else they’re gonna start a fight
Cuz they’ve been waiting a while in line, to get a glimpse for which they pine
Of everybody’s favorite plant
Thanks for putting up with my rant
And thanks most of all, to Lois!

Lois is quite a muse! in addition to inspiring this song, she’s also inspired more than 3 dozen haiku! Watch her on our Corpse Flower webcam any time – and she if she inspires you, too.

AMORPHOPHALLUS TITANUMI

[Be warned: this post is written with tongue in cheek and should be read as such.]

I want y'all to think for a minute. What girl hasn't wished for a beautiful song to be written about her? A song dedicated to her timeless beauty. A song extolling her many virtues. A song she can call her own. Ahhhhh, a song envied by all other girls. *long, slow, and deep inhalation followed by a quick exhale*
I have dreamed of that kind of song for myself. Alas, there are none to be found. Oh, sure, there are those songs that make mention of Superman and Lois Lane, but that doesn't count. I can't call them mine - they were not written FOR ME. *Chanting: I must not allow bitterness to settle within my heart. I must not. Also, biting my fingers in exaggeration like they do in the movies, closing my eyes, and turning my face away*
Cheer up, friends! I may not have a famous song written about me, nor for me, nor even vaguely hinting of my effervescence and style. But I do have this one thing . . . Amorphophallus titanumi. *Aha! Bet you can't say that. Literally!*

You may be asking, "What is Amorphophallus titanumi?"

You may be saying, "Why, that sounds AMAZING? I wish I had one!"

You may even be a LIT-tle bit jealous that you don't have one of your own - exclaiming, "I want one! I want one, too! And I want it NOW!!!!!" *stamping your feet and adopting a sour expression*

Relax. I do not wish for you to remain in suspenders. Uh, no, I mean in suspense. I will now reveal what Amorphophallus titanumi is. It is a flower. But wait! It is not your ordinary, run-of-the-mill flower. This flower reaches heights of 7-10 feet and has a diameter of 5-6 feet. This floral beauty is one of the largest and rarest flowers in the world!

Actually, it is quite a "celebrity" among the plant community, *taking on a deep, braggadocios radio voice and a smug appearance with one eyebrow lifted slightly higher than the other as I slant my head to one side like a cockatoo while continuing to speak* AND she is affectionately referred to as "Lois." (Don't you wish you were me?)

Check out this photo.
This specimen is on display in the Cockrell Butterfly Center at the Houston Museum of Natural Science. *Ooooh's and ahhhh's* She is quite the diva. My sources tell me that she was expected to be in full bloom over the weekend between July 9 - 11, 2010, but she hasn't done so as of the writing of this post. People are FLOCKING from all directions just to get a glimpse of her. She is being blogged about. You can watch her grow live on web cam. She even twitters! Yes, all eyes are on her. The crowds are out of control! Amorphophallus titanumi . . . Lois fever has hit the great state of Texas. Dare I say . . . the nation, as well?

"Hahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!! With such an exquisite, priceless, and rare flower as this bearing MY name, I say, 'Who needs a song written about them?' " *In case you didn't get it, this laughter and question are to be read as if they were malicious, taunting, and umm, what's that word? Oh yeah, boastful.*

TIME OUT/CUT/STOP THE PRESSES: Uh, this is kinda embarrassing after all the hoopla I have tried to generate about Amorphophallus titanumi . . . Lois. After I probably made you feel really sad that YOU don't have a rare flower named after you *Nanny, nanny boo boo!* After I laid claim to such awesomeness *Avert your eyes! I have not given you permission to look upon me.* And, after I sorta left out some important information regarding her COMPLETE NAME and description *Well, of course Officer, I saw the speed limit sign. Ahem. I just didn't see YOU.*

Oh, don't get me wrong, everything I've said about her is accurate, but do you see those three little dots between Amorphophallus titanumi and Lois? That's called an ellipsis. It is a mark showing an intentional omission. In other words, I left something out on purpose. I left out the words, "Corpse Flower." And, did I forget to say that along with being one of the largest and rarest flowers in the world, she is also one of the SMELLIEST. *P. U.*

Okay. So now you know "the rest of the story." As you can see, you really DON'T have anything of which to be jealous. I've misled you, this is true, but I am still without a song. Are you satisfied now? Huh? You who probably has 2 or 3 songs of which you could call your own. *Who's smug now? Yeah, yeah.*

I should've said Amorphophallus titanumi: Corpse Flower "Lois" right from the start. But I didn't. *making a really dumb, sarcastic "duh!" face with crossed and bulging eyes* We all know what a corpse is. Sooooo, in short, this flower (whose description as defined by the Oxford American dictionary is a dead body) shares my name. Now tell me, how romantic is that? Oh, and did I mention that when this Amorphophallus titanumi Corpse Flower "Lois" blooms she is gonna smell like the grave? *Yum-O!* Can you believe the masses are just DYING *pun intended* to bombard their nostrils with her stench? They are waiting with great anticipation, and they are actually PAYING to be able to do so. There is no limit to their devotion. They've even made buttons and T-shirts to commemorate the occasion! Oh, don't believe me? Well, I have proof. Just look for yerself, kiddo.

*I bet I could find a super cute jacket on which to wear that "I LOVE LOIS" button.* =)

Looks like the gig's up. I knew you'd find out sooner or later. It was fun while it lasted, though. Haha!

Well, I hope you got a laugh or two at my expense. If not, and you are sitting there . . . just sitting there . . . don't worry. Be happy! You'll be your normal, stuffy self any moment now. And hey, for all you plant lovers, curious people, and folks with nuttin' better to do - you can learn more about this unique flower by checking out the links below. See ya and thanks for stoppin' by! =)

http://blog.hmns.org/?tag=lois

www.hmnsmedia.org/CorpseFlower/

SLEEPLESS ON THE GULF COAST

Guess who woke up at 2:20 this morning? Yep. You guessed it, our little man.  I thought you might like to see some of the pictures I took of him bouncing up and down in his crib looking as adorable as a baby can look.

Ain't he a stinker??

AAHHH, CHOCOLATE

This afternoon my son and I made these cookies. I mixed up the ingredients (the FUN part), he baked them (the HARD part), and we all ate them (the BEST part). Of course, the most delicious way to wash these babies down is with a cute little glass of semi-sweet chocolate chips! Who needs milk?? =)

You can find this recipe in my RECIPE page under my Stick Family. Look for CHOCOLATE CHIPPY, NUTTY, COCONUTTY COOKIES.

LASIK UPDATE

Well, hubby seems to feel that the LASIK surgery was a success! He is very happy with the results. Only one small "tweak" needs to be made to help get his close range vision up to speed. He has to give it a month, but if it hasn't cleared up by then, he will most likely be going under the laser again. He does need to use eye drops several times each day, but that's a small inconvenience considering he now has 20/15 eyesight!

As for me? Well, lets just say I'll be sportin' these beauties awhile longer. =)

GOD IS SO GOOD

After years of faithfully serving and providing for me and our children my husband has finally put himself first.  Our son wanted to do something for his dad, and my husband really wanted to have his vision corrected . . . so today was the day he had LASIK eye surgery. WHAT A WONDERFUL BLESSING

Everything went perfectly. The procedure was basically done in "a blink of an eye" (pun intended ;) It is truly amazing what God has allowed doctors to do. First, a corneal flap was made on both eyes. My husband said he felt pressure and a little discomfort, but it was over SO FAST! He couldn't believe how quickly the doctor was able to work.

After the flaps were made he was ushered into a little room right outside of the operating room where he was told to rest his eyes a short while. Within 10 minutes he was lying on another table on the opposite side of the operating room where the doctor completed the procedure. This time he said he felt nothing.

He saw circles of light at one point when the lasers were being used on his eyes. The doctor told him to look up, or down, or at a green light, and before he knew it, he was ready to go home. Each eye was given a protective covering (or shield) in order to prevent anything from disturbing the flaps which had already begun to adhere in their original position. A fashionable pair of sunglasses completed his ensemble.









Once home his instructions were to sleep. It is best to keep the eyes closed right after surgery. He was given several different eye drops to use for the next 5 days. These eye drops are to prevent infection, inflammation, discomfort, and to keep the eyes moist. My hubby's been fast asleep for several hours now. I expect he'll be asleep until I wake him for his follow-up appointment. I can not tell you how excited I am to see his face when he opens his "new" eyes for the first time tomorrow. All I can say is, "God is SO good!

Oh, yeah - if he looks a little "dopey" in the pictures - we're blaming it on the Valium! :)

MONDAY MORNING BATTLE CRY

IT'S LIFE'S LITTLE BLESSINGS THAT MAKE ME SMILE

Yesterday my husband came home from a long, hard day at work. He took a few minutes to relax on our bed while I sat with him and held our little one.

Our little baby began smiling, laughing, singing, grunting, wiggling, bopping, twisting, pushing, clapping, waving, and nuzzling . . . nodding . . . exhaling. . . relaxing. . . sleeping.

After all that commotion (which by-the-way lasted about 5 minutes), I looked over at Daddy, and what do you know? He had fallen asleep, too!  :)

"OO-RAH!"

I received this ring as a belated birthday gift. The ONLY reason it was late was because I couldn't figure out what I wanted for my birthday. It took me awhile, but then I found this ring. It is PERFECT. I feel blessed to have received this token of love for me! =)

My name is on the left side of the eagle, globe, and anchor, and my husband's name is on the right side (as you look at the ring.) Semper Fidelis is engraved on the inside of the band. That is the Marine Corps motto and it means, "Always faithful."

DOES THIS TREE GROW IN YOUR YARD?

I hired a plumber to help me restore an old farmhouse.

He had just finished a rough first day on the job: a flat tire made him lose an hour of work, his electric drill quit, and his ancient one-ton truck refused to start.

While I drove him home, he sat in stony silence. On arriving, he invited me in to meet his family. As we walked toward the front door, he paused briefly at a small tree, touching the tips of the branches with both hands.

When opening the door he underwent an amazing transformation! His face was wreathed in smiles and he hugged his two small children and gave his wife a kiss.

Afterward, he walked me to the car. We passed the tree and my curiosity got the better of me. I asked him about what I had seen him do earlier.

"Oh, that's my trouble tree," he replied. "I know I can't help having troubles on the job, but one thing's for sure, those troubles don't belong in the house with my wife and the children. So, I just hang them up on the tree every night when I come home, and ask God to take care of 'em. Then in the morning I pick 'em up again. Funny thing is," he smiled, "when I come out in the morning to pick 'em up, there aren't nearly as many as I remember hanging up the night before."

CHICK-FIL-A BALLAD

CHARLIE BIT ME

CHARLIE BIT ME . . . 15 YEARS LATER

A CHUCKLE 4U - "Worth A Thousand Words"

Here is a picture of the latest cell phone technology. It's the new "Hands Free Adapter."

*******************************************************

I read an article that said the typical symptoms of stress are eating too much, impulse buying, and driving too fast. ARE THEY KIDDING? That's my idea of a perfect day! :)

NEED I SAY MORE?

CAN YOU ANSWER THIS RIDDLE?

When asked this riddle, 80% of kindergarten students GOT the answer, compared to 17% of Stanford University seniors. Let's see how well you guys do...

What is greater than God, more evil than the devil, the poor have it, the rich need it, and if you eat it, you will die?

Leave your answer in my comments box. Thanks! ;)

AAHHH, TASTY!

Almost time to start feeding Maximus solid foods. Do you think I should start him on this?? ;)

ONE DAY TOO LATE

(These are the lyrics to a beautiful, but truly sad song.)

ONE DAY TOO LATE

I never thought I'd see the day, When you'd come to kneel and pray;

I never though that I would see, the church house filled to capacity.

And outside the door there's more, who have never come before ...

Oh, what a shame - that Jesus came - just one day before!

(chorus) You came just one day too late. One day too late. Jesus came and you've been left behind to wait. Yesterday you couldn't find, time for Jesus on your mind. You finally came to call His Name, but one day too late!

You tried to live the best you could, you tried to do the things that you should;

But when it came to serving God, You said I still, I still have time to wait.

But now it's all turned around, the time to serve Him now you've found ...

How sad the fate - you found the time - just one day too late!

(chorus) You came just one day too late. One day too late. Jesus came and you've been left behind to wait. Yesterday you couldn't find, time for Jesus on your mind. You finally came to call His Name, but one day too late!

You finally came to call His Name, but one day too late! One day too late!!

"Therefore be ye also ready: for in such an hour as ye think not the Son of man cometh."

(Matthew 24:44)

A LITTLE "HOT HEADED"

There once was a little boy who had a bad temper.

His father gave him a bag of nails and told him that every time he lost his temper, he must hammer a nail into the back of the fence.

The first day the boy had driven 37 nails into the fence. Over the next few weeks, as he learned to control his anger, the number of nails hammered daily gradually dwindled down. He discovered it was easier to hold his temper than to drive those nails into the fence . . .

Finally, the day came when the boy didn't lose his temper at all. He told his father about it and the father suggested that they boy now pull out one nail for each day that he was able to hold his temper. The days passed and the young boy was finally able to tell his father that all of the nails were gone.

The father took his son by the hand and led him to the fence. He said, "You have done well, my son, but look at the holes in the fence. The fence will never be the same. When you say things in anger, they leave a scar just like this one. You can put a knife in a man and draw it out. It won't matter how many times you say, I'm sorry, the wound will still be there."

A verbal wound is as bad as a physical one. Let's not be guilty of either.

LIQUID DEVIL

"Who hath woe?

who hath sorrow?

who hath contentions?

who hath babbling?

who hath wounds without a cause?

who hath redness of eyes?

They that tarry long at the wine;

they that go to seek mixed wine.

Look not thou upon the wine when it is red,

when it giveth his colour in the cup,

when it moveth itself aright.

At the last it biteth like a serpent,

and stingeth like an adder.

Thine eyes shall behold strange women,

and thine heart shall utter perverse things.

Yea, thou shalt be as he that lieth down in the midst of the sea,

or as he that lieth upon the top of a mast.

They have stricken me, shalt thou say, and I was not sick;

they have beaten me, and I felt it not:

when shall I awake?

I will seek it yet again."

(Proverbs 23:29-35)

QUOTES TO LIVE (AND LAUGH) BY

If you don't support our troops, FEEL FREE TO STAND IN FRONT OF THEM.

No trespassing. Violators will be shot. Survivors will be shot again.

When the devil reminds you of your past, be sure to remind him of his future.

Whenever I feel blue, I start breathing again.

Due to the highly confidential nature of my job, I am not allowed to know what I am doing.

Unattended children will be given an espresso and a free puppy.

Those who throw objects at the alligators will be asked to retrieve them.

I suffer from INSOMNIA during the night and CHRONIC FATIGUE SYNDROME during the day.

Did I mention I have Attention Deficit Dis . . .
. . . oooh, shiny!

Life is like a corn dog. I don't know why, it just is.

Coffee is not a drug, it's a vitamin! (And so are donuts - only they're BIGGER.)

1 + 1? That's easy! 11, duh!

I enjoy skipping through hallways. Some people think I'm weird, but my friends just expect it.

It takes skill to trip over air.

I smile because I have no idea what's going on. :)

My favorite number of the alphabet is yellow.

Even if the voices aren't real, they have some good ideas . . .

I'M LOST. I've gone to look for myself. If I should return before I get back, please ask me to wait.

DRINK COFFEE - do STUPID things FASTER and with MORE ENERGY.

TRUE friends are HARD to find, HARDER to leave, and IMPOSSIBLE to FORGET.

You can't scare me . . . I'm a Mom of MARINES! (Oo-rah!)

************************************************************************************
Hey, y'all! If you liked these quotes let's get some interaction going. Leave me a comment and let me know which one (if any) made you laugh. How 'bout it? Invite someone to look at this post and let's get them involved, too. WHO DOESN'T NEED A GOOD LAUGH, RIGHT? :)

BBQ, ANYONE?

 Two weeks ago our son, O'Man, barbecued for our family using wood from our pecan trees instead of charcoal. He started the fire and let the embers ash over. He waited a good 3-4, maybe 5, hours. None of the meat was burnt! :)

Did you know an onion works really well to clean the grill? It sure does! That's what he's doing in this photo.

Here is what we ended up with . . . and boy, oh boy, was it ever goo-ood!! :)

We had hotdogs, hamburgers, drumsticks and ALL the fixin's. It wasn't long before we had our little man come by askin' fer some grub.

 He had a hankerin' fer Bar-B-Q!!

DO YOU FEEL SPECIAL?

Yesterday was Mother's Day. The rose you see to the left was given to me by our church during the morning service. I thought that was very special and it made me feel very special. Of course, I was not singled out. ALL the ladies of our church were honored with a lovely rose if they were in attendance.

I trust someone honored you, dear mother, on Mother's Day 2010!

JUST SAY, "NO!"

I ruin without killing.

I tear down homes, wreck lives, and break hearts.

I have NO RESPECT for truth or justice, and NO MERCY for the defenseless.

You will find me in the pews of the pious and in the haunts of the unholy.

I am wily, cunning, malicious - and I gather strength with age.

I feed on good and bad alike.

My victims are as numerous as the sands of the sea, and often as innocent.

I never forgive and I seldom forget.

My name is GOSSIP.

(Friends, just say, "No!" to gossip.)

A FULL TOOLBAR . . . YIPEE!!

Okay, this might be a strange thing to blog about, but that's one thing I love about blogs -

I can be strange if I want to!

Now, on to my tale of woe . . .

Shortly after starting my blog my toolbar shrunk and I lost most of the thinga-ma-jiggies on it. (All together now. 1, 2, 3 . . . "Awwwww.") This was very disappointing to me. :(

I could not figure out what happened. I even asked a friend to help me out. It was useless ... until I went to blogger.com for HELP. I wish I had checked there sooner because the answer was sooooo easy!

Somehow the default tab on "New Post" got switched from "Compose" to "Edit Html." All I have to do now is hit the "Compose" tab before I begin a new post and I am back in business with A FULL Toolbar . . . YIPEE!!

I can even add a goofy picture and a quote from a famous person:

If you find it hard to laugh at yourself,

I would be happy to do it for you!" - Groucho Marx

(Err, sorry if I scared you with that goofy picture.)

A LIL COMMENTARY, IF I MAY . . .

The three pictures below show something amazing. To our family, these pictures show the Hand of God. When we returned, from having evacuated the year Ike hit us, this is what we came home to. When I saw it I COULD NOT stop saying, "WOW!"

In the first picture you see a tree that blew onto our front porch roof. It knocked out our porch rail and that's about all it did. Okay, "Wow."

However, in the second and third pictures you see a HUGE tree branch that could have very easily CRUSHED our a good portion of our cozy lil home.  But no! This branch was "placed" next to our home. We are talking millimeters. She barely brushed up against it!

If you look closely in the second picture you can see our "Cutie" standing on the branch and our "Beauty" prominently kneeling near the lamppost. (It even missed the lamppost! Ha!) See how BIG it was?!

And in the third picture you can see my hubby and the kiddos standing on our deck in the midst of the wreckage. They look so small to me. You can even see where the branch broke off from the tree if you look at the lower right-side of the photo. CRACK!

Our neighbors STAYED during hurricane Ike. The father said he watched our tree limbs twist and turn and SNAP back. He said it was very scary! They just kept doing that frightful "dance" and he could hear them. He said they wouldn't be staying behind for any more hurricanes in the future. I was glad to hear that!

I was simply AMAZED at how close this massive tree branch came to taking out such a large portion of our home. The first thing I thought was, "Thank you, Lord! YOU guided this bruiser of a tree branch within a whisper of our home just so I could see Your power and providence for ME and my family." At that time in my life this was extremely important for me to see and understand. God knew EXACTLY what I needed to know to see that He had NOT forgotten nor forsaken me. PRAISE GOD FOR HIS MERCY AND GRACE! :)

WOW! DID YOU SEE THAT?

IT'S THAT TIME AGAIN . . . ARE YOU READY?

This is my husband on our neighbor's tractor. ("Hi, babee! You good-lookin' thang, you! ;)

This photo was taken some time after hurricane Ike blew through and we were 'allowed' back on our property. Our yard was a mess, but God was very good to us. We ended up getting a new roof outta the deal. That's not bad. Friends of ours were johnny-on-the-spot offering their help. That meant more to us than they will ever truly know. The place was cleaned up lickety-split with all of us working. (Ahem, ummm I don't think I did much work in the yard, though. Gotta be honest about that. But it was fun watching and taking pictures! :)

Anyway, it's that time again - hurricane season! We love it. We hate it. Mostly we just dread it. Evacuation can be like a mini-vacation most of the time, and lots of memories can be made. We've got good ones and bad ones. (The bad ones don't bother us any more, and the good ones are treasured!) Not knowing for sure if we should pack the school books and pictures and my Grammy's 3 little fishies hanging over my shower is quite nerve racking, to say the least. Of course, we always find ourselves wondering if this is the year the Gulf of Mexico will decide to grow larger by swallowing up our home! (Hey, look! There goes Rod and Staff English 8 and Saxon 87 floating right on by!)

Oh, well. I never liked grading that stuff anywho. ;)

PUNCTUATION IS EVERYTHING

An English professor wrote the words, "a woman without her man is nothing" on the blackboard and directed the students to punctuate it correctly.

The men wrote: "A woman, without her man, is nothing."

The women wrote: "A woman: without her, man is nothing."

A CHUCKLE 4U - "Watch Out"

A funeral service is being held in a church for a woman who has just passed away. At the end of the service the pallbearers are carrying the casket out, when they accidentally bump into a wall jarring the casket.

They hear a faint moan. They open the casket and find that the woman is actually alive!

She lives for ten more years and then dies. A ceremony is held again at the same church and at the end of the ceremony the pallbearers are again carrying out the casket.

As they are walking the husband cries out, "WATCH OUT FOR THE WALL!"

OVERWORKED

For a couple of years I've been blaming it on a lack of sleep and too much pressure from my job, but now I've found out the real reason: I'm tired because I'm overworked.

The population of this country is 237 million. 104 million are retired. That leaves 133 million to do the work.

There are 85 million in school, which leaves 48 million to the work. Of this there are 29 million employed by the federal government, leaving 19 million to do the work.

2.8 million are in the Armed Forces, which leaves 16.2 million to do the work. Take from the total the 14,800,000 people who work for State and City Governments and that leaves 1.4 million to do the work.

At any given time there are 188,000 people in hospitals, leaving 1,212,000 to do the work. Now there are 1,211,998 people in prisons. That leaves just 2 people to do the work . . . YOU and ME!

PLEASE DON'T BE OFFENDED

Skinny people irritate me! Especially when they say things like...

"Ya know, sometimes I FORGET TO EAT."

Now, I've forgotten my passwords, my library card, and even my purse, but I have NEVER forgotten to eat.

You have to be a special kind of stupid to forget to eat!

. . . or blonde.

(I apologize to anyone who doesn't think this is funny. However, I THINK IT'S HILARIOUS!! I'm neither skinny nor blonde, and even if I were - I doubt I would forget to eat.  :)

WHAT'S IT TO YOU?

To realize the value of ONE MONTH, ask a mother who gave birth to a premature baby.

To realize the value of ONE WEEK, ask the editor of a weekly newspaper.

To realize the value of ONE HOUR, ask the lovers who are waiting to meet.

To realize the value of ONE MINUTE, ask the person who missed the train.

To realize the value of ONE SECOND, ask the person who just avoided an accident.

To realize the value of ONE MILLISECOND, ask the person who won a silver medal in the Olympics.

LET US TREASURE EVERY MOMENT WE HAVE remembering that . . .

Yesterday is history. Tomorrow is mystery. Today is a gift.

LEARNING . . . AGAIN

Some people have to learn to walk again after surviving a serious accident. On their journey to mobility they will experience moments of exuberance as each hurdle is mastered, and yet, unexpected set backs can deflate even the most hopeful of souls. Each day must be taken one-by-one, hour-by-hour, and minute-by-minute. Every step will be filled with pain and victory.

Numbness, in one form or another, reigns in the bodies of these individuals, and it will take time for feeling to return. The Oxford American Dictionary defines numb as being 'deprived of the power to feel or move.'

Most everyone who has been to the dentist to have a cavity filled or to the surgeon for an operation has experienced this sensation. It is a welcomed loss of feeling, indeed, when used to block the pain of such procedures. Usually, the passing of time is all that is needed for the anesthetic to wear off.

One's sense of feeling returns on a case-by-case basis. Most people enjoy a rather rapid return of their faculties and go on to live full and productive lives. Their memories of the incident are filed away, and the details, which at first were so vivid, eventually fade.

Similarly, some people have to learn to LIVE again after surviving spiritual abuse. At times it may be hard to love again, laugh again, or to even trust again when one is engulfed in 'emotional' numbness. It is possible that some will remain prisoner to the numbness, be it physical or spiritual. In these cases the senses do not re-awaken and complete paralysis sets in.

What happens next is any one's guess. The individual may decide one of two things. Either he will give up, or he will LEARN . . . AGAIN.

BABIES + MOMMAS = FRIENDS! :)

My friend made this collage and placed it on her blog in tribute to these little guys, and now I want to add it to my blog in tribute to our sons...and to OUR renewed friendship. Praise God for giving me "beauty for ashes."

MY BELOVED IS MINE, AND I AM HIS

"If you live to be a hundred, I want to live to be a hundred minus one day so I never have to live without you."

~ A.A.Milne

DON'T GIVE ME NO LIP

Bonding time.  Ain't he cute? Daddy, I mean, not the baby. ;)


(In all fairness to Daddy, this was the only picture I could find of him and the baby together, because he was the one taking all the pictures!)

OUR NEWEST ARRIVAL

Such a good baby from conception (except for the first three months when I was sicker than a dawg and flat in bed. Ugh!) Aaaah, memories. :)

MOMMA AND BABY

This is me and our newest little blessing. I am so happy in this picture because my hair looks so great! Haha! That's partly true, but I'm really so happy because God has blessed us with yet another child . .. and at my age! "PRAISE THE LORD!"

HEAVY WITH CHILD

Hello, there! This is me not too long before I gave birth to our last little one.

IT'S NOT THE CRITIC WHO COUNTS

It is not the critic who counts.

Not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles or where the doer of deeds could have done better.

The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena,

whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood,

who strives valiantly, who errs and comes up short again and again,

because there is no effort without error or shortcoming,

but who knows the great enthusiasms, the great devotions, who spends himself for a worthy cause;

who, at the best, knows, in the end, the triumph of high achievement,

and who, at the worst, if he fails, at least he fails while daring greatly,

so that his place shall NEVER be with those cold and timid souls who knew neither victory nor defeat.

~Theodore Roosevelt

WORDS OF WISDOM

Life is too Short to Wake up with Regrets, so...

Love the People Who Treat You Right.

Pray for the Ones Who Don't.

Believe Everything Happens for a Reason.

If You Get a Second Chance, Grab it with Both Hands.

If it Changes Your Life , Let it.

Nobody said Life Would be Easy, they Just Promised it Would be Worth it ...

A CHUCKLE 4U - "So True . . . It's Scary!"

Mom and Dad were watching TV when Mom said, "I'm tired, and it's getting late. I think I'll go to bed."

She went to the kitchen to make sandwiches for the next day's lunches, rinsed out the popcorn bowls, took meat out of the freezer for supper the following evening, checked the cereal box levels, filled the sugar container, put spoons and bowls on the table, and started the coffee pot for brewing the next morning. She then put some wet clothes into the dryer, put a load of clothes into the wash, ironed a shirt, and secured a loose button. She picked up the newspapers strewn on the floor, picked up the game pieces left on the table, and put the telephone book back into the drawer. She watered the plants, emptied a wastebasket, and hung up a towel to dry. She yawned and stretched and headed for the bedroom. She stopped by the desk and wrote a note to the teacher, counted out some cash for the field trip, and pulled a textbook out from hiding under the chair. She signed a birthday card for a friend, addressed and stamped the envelope, and wrote a quick note for the grocery store. She put both near her purse. Mom then creamed her face, put on moisturizer, brushed and flossed her teeth, and trimmed her nails.

Hubby called out, "I thought you were going to bed."

"I'm on my way," she said.

She put some water into the dog's dish and put the cat outside, then made sure the doors were locked. She looked in on each of the kids and turned out a bedside lamp, hung up a shirt, threw some dirty socks in the hamper, and had a brief conversation with the one up still doing homework. In her own room, she set the alarm, laid out clothing for the next day, and straightened up the shoe rack. She added three things to her list of things to do for tomorrow.

About that time, the hubby turned off the television and announced, to no one in particular, "I'm going to bed," . . . and he did!

A thought from me: There are a few times when I really wish I were more like a man. This is one of them. ;)

TOP PRIORITY

If every person in the world had adequate food, housing, and income; if all men were equal; if every possible social evil and injustice were done away with, men would still need one thing:  JESUS CHRIST.

SCARED TO DEATH

Mr. Whitman told of a boastful, vociferous, rock-ribbed atheist who was dared by his cronies to go out into a cemetery at midnight, hammer a cross into the ground, and then shout three times, "There is NO God!"

He accepted the dare and went to the cemetery, knelt down and hammered a cross into the ground. While kneeling, he shouted, "There is NO God! There is NO God! There is NO God!" He started to rise up to leave, but he was held fast and could not move. Something held him fast, yet there was no visible hand upon him. It seemed as though an invisible power was replying to his shouts. The shock of it so frightened the atheist that he dropped dead.

What held him fast? It was a very simple thing. He had hammered the wooden cross through the hem of his overcoat.

A CHUCKLE 4U - "Oh, To be Six Again!"

A man was sitting on the edge of the bed, observing his wife looking at herself in the mirror. Since her birthday was not far off he asked what she would like to have for her birthday.

"I'd like to be six again," she replied, still looking in the mirror.

On the morning of her birthday, he arose early, made her a nice big bowl of Lucky Charms, and then took her to Six Flags theme park. WHAT A DAY!! He put her on every ride in the park; the Death Slide, the Wall of Fear, the Screaming Monster Roller Coaster . . . everything there was.

Five hours later they staggered out of the theme park. Her head was reeling and her stomach felt upside down. He then took her to McDonalds where he ordered her a Happy Meal with extra fries and a chocolate shake. Then it was off to a movie, popcorn, a soda pop, and her favorite candy, M&Ms. WHAT A FABULOUS ADVENTURE!!

Finally, she wobbled home with her husband and collapsed into bed exhausted. He leaned over his wife and with a BIG SMILE lovingly asked, "Well, dear, what was it like being six again?"

Her eyes slowly opened and her expression suddenly changed. "I meant MY DRESS SIZE."

A CHUCKLE 4U - "Mayhem"

One afternoon a man came home from work to find TOTAL MAYHEM in his house.

His three children were outside, still in their pajamas, playing in the mud, with empty food boxes and wrappers strewn all around the front yard. The door of his wife's car was open, as was the front door to the house.

Proceeding into the entry, he found an even BIGGER mess. A lamp had been knocked down and the throw rug was wadded against one wall. In the front room the television was loudly blaring a cartoon channel, and the family room was strewn with toys and various items of clothing. In the kitchen, dishes filled the sink, breakfast food was spilled on the floor, a broken glass lay under the table, and a small pile of sand was spread by the back door.

He quickly headed up the stairs, stepping over toys and more piles of clothes, looking for his wife. He was worried she may be ill, or that something serious had happened. He found her LOUNGING in the bedroom, still curled up in the bed in her pajamas, reading a novel. She looked up at him, smiled, and asked how his day went.

He looked at her bewildered and asked, "WHAT HAPPENED HERE TODAY??"

She smiled again and said, "You know every day when you come home from work and ask me 'what in the world' I did today?"

"Yes," was his incredulous reply.

Then she confessed, "Well, today I didn't do it!"

A CHUCKLE 4U - "Pancakes"

A mother was preparing pancakes for her sons, Ryan, age 5, and Billy, age 3. The boys began to argue over who would get the first pancake.

Their mother saw the opportunity for a moral lesson. "If Jesus were sitting here, He would say, "Let my brother have the first pancake. I can wait."

Ryan turned to his younger brother and said, "Billy, you be Jesus!"

WORDS TO LIVE (AND LAUGH) BY

Handle every stressful situation like a dog. If you can't eat it or play with it, just pee on it and walk away.

Some people are like slinkies - not really good for anything, but they bring a smile to your face when pushed down the stairs.

God gives every bird its food, but He doesn't throw it into its nest.

Surviving and living your life successfully requires courage. The goals and dreams you're seeking require courage and risk-taking. Learn from the turtle - it only makes progress when it sticks out its neck.

He who dies with the most toys is still dead.

WUTZ RONG WIT DIS?

Eye halve a spelling chequer
It came with my pea sea
It plainly marques four my revue
Miss steaks eye kin knot sea.
Eye strike a key and type a word
And weight four it two say
Weather eye am wrong oar write
It shows me strait a weigh.
As soon as a mist ache is maid
It nose bee fore two long
And eye can put the error rite
Its rare lea ever wrong.
Eye have run this poem threw it
I am shore your pleased two no
Its letter perfect awl the weigh
My chequer tolled me sew.

WORDS OF WISDOM

Be more concerned with your character than your reputation. Your character is what YOU REALLY ARE, while your reputation is merely what others THINK you are.

Silence is often misinterpreted, but never misquoted.

We do not remember days, but moments. Life moves too fast, so enjoy your precious moments.

It's all right to sit on your pity pot every now and again. Just be sure to flush when you are done.

Nothing is real to you until you experience it, otherwise it's just here say.

Blessed are the flexible, for they shall not be bent out of shape.

Laugh every day, it's like inner jogging.

A CHUCKLE 4U - "The Texan"

Several aspiring psychiatrists were attending their first class on emotional extremes.

"Just to establish some parameters," said the professor to the student from Arkansas, "What is the opposite of joy?" "Sadness," replied the student.

"And the opposite of depression?" he asked the young lady from Oklahoma. "Elation," she said.

"And, you, sir," he said to the young man from Texas, "how about the opposite of woe?"

The Texan replied, "Sir, I believe that would be giddy-up."

A CHUCKLE 4U - "New Pet"

A lonely man decided life would be more fun if he had a pet. So he went to the pet store and told the owner that he wanted to buy an unusual pet. After some discussion, he finally bought a centipede. It came complete with a little white box to use for its house. He took the box back home, found a good location for the box, and decided he would start off by taking his new pet shopping.

So he went to the centipede's little house and asked, "Would you like to go shopping with me?" But there was no answer from his new pet.

This bothered him a bit, but he waited a few minutes and then asked him again, "How about going shopping with me?" But again, there was no answer from his new friend and pet. So he waited a few minutes more, thinking about the situation.

He decided to ask one more time; this time putting his face up against the centipede's house he shouted, "HEY, IN THERE. WOULD YOU LIKE TO GO SHOPPING WITH ME?"

A little voice came out of the box: "I heard you the first time. I'm puttin' on my shoes!"

WORDS OF WISDOM

The tongue weighs practically nothing, but so few people can hold it.

Light travels faster than sound. That's why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.

When one is in deep water, it is highly advisable that he keep his mouth shut.

Between the great things we can't do and the small things we won't do, the danger is we will do nothing.

Anger is only one letter short of danger.

To handle yourself, use your head; to handle others, use your heart.

Learn from the mistakes of others. You can't live long enough to make them all yourself.

Beautiful young people are acts of nature, but beautiful old people are works of art.

Many people will walk in and out of your life, but only true friends will leave footprints in your heart.

Great minds discuss ideas. Average minds discuss events. Small minds discuss people.

PIGS DON'T . . .

A Christian farmer visited the city and entered a restaurant for a meal. His table was near some young men who noticed he bowed his head and prayed quietly before starting his meal. Observing this, they decided to ridicule him.

One called out saying, "Hey farmer, does everyone do that where you live?"

The older man was ready with an answer that sort of quieted the crowd a bit. "No, son, the pigs don't."

I AM A CHRISTIAN!

I don't claim to be 'The World's Greatest Christian' by any means, but praise God, I AM a Christian.

I was led down the ROMANS Road. "As it is written, There is none righteous, no, not one:" (3:10). I realized I WAS A SINNER. 

"For the wages of sin is death;..." (6:23a). I SAW MYSELF IN HELL had I died before that day. I was furious as I thought, "I never killed anybody! I never stole a car!"

"But God commendeth his love toward us, in that, while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us." (5:8). I SAW JESUS, God's only Son, DYING and SHEDDING HIS BLOOD FOR ME and I wept as despair overtook me.

"...but the gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord." (6:23b). I FELT LOVE that I didn't deserve.

"That if thou shalt confess with thy mouth the Lord Jesus, and shalt believe in thine heart that God hath raised him from the dead, thou shalt be saved." (10:9) I BELIEVED!!

"For with the heart man believeth unto righteousness; and with the mouth confession is made unto salvation." (10:10) I CONFESSED MY SINS and ASKED JESUS into my heart TO BE MY PERSONAL LORD AND SAVIOR.

"For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved." (10:13) I RECEIVED ASSURANCE that I was a child of God and my sins were forgiven.

I made THE BEST DECISION of my life. Spiritually I was born again when JESUS SAVED ME. Praise God for Holy Spirit conviction! I know my home will be in heaven when I die BECAUSE OF WHAT JESUS HAS DONE in me.

THANK YOU, DEAR CHRISTIAN FRIEND, for loving my soul enough to tell me about Jesus and what He could do for me! "The fruit of the righteous is a tree of life; and he that winneth souls is wise." (Proverbs 11:30 KJV 1611)

A CHUCKLE 4U - "Morning Coffee"

A little boy surprised his mother one morning with a cup of coffee in bed. He made it himself and was so proud. He waited while his mother finished the whole cup. She had never had such a bad cup of coffee, and as she forced down the last sip she noticed three little army guys in the bottom of the cup.

She asked, "Honey, why did you put three army men in the bottom of my cup?"

Her son replied, "You know, it's like on tv, 'The best part of waking up is soldiers in your cup."